What is in sex education?

This question is the subject of debate on several levels and the answer is not easy to give or the problem to solve. Nevertheless, the elements that seem to be the most relevant, although the list is not exhaustive, could be the following:

We talk about it, we live from it and we constantly reinforce it. Performance as a whole is a trait in our societies that has been maintained for a long time. It infiltrates everywhere, even into our sexuality. We are by definition competitive beings. It certainly has its uses in certain areas, but sexual relations seem to suffer more than to be enjoyed. Too often, in private practice, sexologists and psychotherapists meet individuals and couples under the pressure of sexual performance. You have to do this and you have to do that to reach the ultimate pleasure which is ORGASM. Yet this pleasure, despite being rewarding and extraordinary, does not last more than 6 to 20 seconds and I am generous when I say 20.

However, sexuality revolves around performance to achieve or provide the ultimate pleasure in the other. Alas, what happened to the several minutes before. Do we really take the time to have pleasure during the sexual act or only for this explosive purpose. We can actually notice this trend when we explore people’s sexuality in depth. In fact, this performance is so important that it even detracts from the pleasure it is supposed to provide. Entering sexuality right away with the idea of performing causes anxiety and activates our insecurities of incompetence and undesirability.

Sex education is not only reserved for young people, but adults too.

---

When questioning what makes people sexually satisfied, we often answer with: “I came” or “I made my partner cum”. If you ask about the rest, you find yourself in front of a blank. Yet, the sexual act as a whole has the opportunity to be satisfying and pleasurable. Unfortunately, what we hear in our offices is often the opposite.

Sex education is the opportunity where we can learn to make people think about the satisfaction they can derive from a sexuality that is complete. Here, I am not talking about “complete” in the sense that he had vaginal penetration and orgasm, but that the partners or individually we enjoyed our sexuality fully and deeply.

Fear of the unknown and the relentless need to categorize men, women, transgenders, sexual orientations, and sexual practices are detrimental to a varied and diverse sexuality. When men and women are forced to act and behave in this or that way in order for them to be accepted, we limit the individualized expression of sexuality. These obligations, directly and indirectly imposed on all different sexual groups, result in judgment and reprimand when prescribed and proscribed norms are not followed.

The more we present diversity, the less we fear it and the more we can enjoy it ourselves. Knowing how to appreciate differences and differences brings a sexuality that is not rigid and restricted in our identities and sexual practices. If we talked more openly about other sexual behaviors apart from the missionary position between 2 heterosexuals, sexuality would be more easily lived and this would allow us to have variety in sexuality, which creates desire and desire to start again.

By educating society and especially our young people to think and appreciate, rather than reject and judge sexual diversity, we would allow the future generation to be themselves and to be able to have fun and explore the VAST playground that sexuality allows us.

Subscribe to the newsletter and receive free videos and articles

* indicates required

Email address *

First name

Name

The evolution of our sexuality begins at birth and ends at our death. We have to stop believing that the pinnacle of our sexuality is in our twenties. Young adults are at the beginning of their sexual exploration and as we all eventually realize, it is not yet mature. I am careful not to use the word immature, because that would be inaccurate and it is also a pejorative vision of young adult sexuality.

We perceive that the false belief that sexuality must be lived fully in our twenties creates apprehensions for a more mature sexuality where sexual functionality (desire, erection, lubrication, orgasm) is less present. We are always looking to have more and more strong physical stimuli in our sexuality, because we focus more often than not on performance in our beginner sexuality.

As we get older, what we notice is that sexuality evolves for the better and not for the worse. We realize that taking our time and being present and connected to the other brings much more satisfaction than pushing the right buttons on the other person’s body. I’m not just talking about a romantic and amorous sexuality. The older we get, the more sensual, torrid, erotic and intimate our sexuality becomes. The sexual connection , and not just the romantic one, develops to achieve a much more satisfying sexuality with our partners.

Informing young people and adults alike about the possibilities and opportunities for their sex life would take away the pressure, fears and difficulties of relationships that are found in people with a stagnant view of their sexuality.